Thursday, May 15, 2014
Thursday, April 24, 2014
|CNN photo of strippers in really cool nursing home|
CNN -- Somebody at a New York nursing home apparently thought it would be a great idea to bring in a young hard body for the elderly residents to watch dance.
Monday, April 21, 2014
Reposted from Sister Sister
If there’s one thing you all should have learned by now it’s that there is no limits to what people will or will not do. You’ve just got to find the right button and give it a little push, some harder than others. Drunken bar sluts have the easiest buttons of all. Hell a slight graze against their button and the panties will fall like a one legged man jumping rope. I’ve proven this theory time and time again in my countless nights of pouring shots and drinks into my would be victims. When it comes right down to it sluts go to bars the same reason Christians go to church, they just want to feel loved. They don’t give a fuck that it will only be for probably one night or in some cases could turn into a few years. They want it, hell some of them actually need it to feel better about themselves or to know that for just one night somebody wants them. It doesn’t matter that more often than not they will never get a phone call after that night or that no friend request will be sent on Facebook or Twitter. So this all leads up to the night I’m going to tell you about. Remember SLUTS HAVE NO CONSCIOUS OR MORALS!!!
Me and a group of dudes caught the train to downtown Chicago one Friday afternoon after we were done with school. We catch a cab to a hotel and all check into our own rooms because we had a bet on who could pull the most ass for the weekend. Everybody gets dressed and we all meet downstairs in the hotel bar for a few shots before we head out on Operation Hoedown. We get to talking with the bartender and ask him where all the sluts hang out on this side of town and he tells us about a few places to try. We pound a few more shots of Cuervo and start to head out for the night. Our plan was we could all split up or do whatever it would take to conquer bitches but we had to stay in at least teams of two. We didn’t do that for any kind of safety reasons we did it because somebody had to verify the number was true and with the amount of money we had on the line someone was bound to try and cheat. We start to head out and I go to pay my tab when the bartender tells me that he’s heard us talking about our mission. He goes on to tell me that the very bar I am standing in will be crawling with ass around eleven that night when all the cougars come out to play. Folks this is the kind of knowledge you can gain when you tip a bartender well. Let that be a fucking lesson. Bartenders are usually your best source for anything you want to know when you’re in an unfamiliar city. I had one buddy that was always a damn good wing man and we always worked well together. No cock blocking and both of us were willing to fuck a fatty if it meant the other one got some prime. I call McNasty over and tell him that we are going to leave like everyone else and just go around the block and double back. The bartender had already been tipped well so we are guaranteed good drinks the rest of the night and the place will be crawling with ass later. He agrees so we set off with the rest of the boys. We get to the end of the block and the others for some reason think we will have better odds if we stick together. Me an McNasty tell them we are going to go on a recon mission at another bar and if it looks promising we will give them a call. They agree and we go our separate ways. Me and Nasty stop in a little Irish pub and grab a drink just to give those guys time to get a little farther away from our killing grounds. The last thing we needed was for one of them to have to come back to the hotel and see us in the bar. About an hour later we head back and sure as hell there was already a few soccer moms starting to filter into the place. We cop a squat at the bar and start to survey the scene. There’s the typical bar whores mixed with the chicks who are having “a much needed girls night out”. Yeah we all know what that means. They need a break from their depressing ass lives of kids and minivans to feel young and slutty again.
We’re drinking and bullshitting with a few chicks when my boy does the impossible. He tells the girl he’s talking to what our plan is and that he wants her to be the first one. I’m expecting him to either get a drink poured on him or slapped, I was wrong. She grabs his hand and tells him to take her to his room. Well played you motherfucker. Now I’m sitting at the bar with that girls three friends and they are all standing around looking confused. I’m just the right amount of drunk and not giving a fuck so I look at the two hottest ones left and tell them I’m not going to be outdone by my boy so all three of us need to go to my room. They didn’t even get to answer before the third one says what about me. She may as well have had loves to fuck tattoo’d on her forehead at that point. Not wanting to give her the upper hand I calmly looked at her and said what about you? She tells us that she’s not staying in the bar alone while the three of us go upstairs to my room. I told her that if she buys the next two rounds of drinks she can go too. One of the hotter ones gets all offended that I wouldn’t include the slightly cute one in the party so she says I can go fuck myself and she will stay in the bar with her friend. I laughed and looked at the slightly cute one and told her she had just been moved to the starting line up. Off me and two of them go and leave the bitch with the attitude sitting in the bar all alone. We go by Nasty’s room just so he can verify what I’m up to and then proceed to my room. I’m feeling pretty good at the moment so I decide to make second string feel special and tell her she’s first. She tells me we will have to go to the shower because she is having lady problems. WHAT THE FUCK? Why would you volunteer to play the game knowing your ass was injured? I politely tell her that’s not going to happen and she can wait downstairs with the other friend while me and the last hope chick take care of business. Not a fucking chance. The third bitch has enough of how I’m talking to her friends so she tells me to go fuck myself too. Great. I just went from a potential three run lead to striking the fuck out with the bases loaded. Now I’m sitting here thinking do I tell my boy or do I not. He’s already had proof that I went to my room with two chicks so I could be an asshole and let him keep thinking that. I decide that there is too much money on the line to give up points so I am going to let him keep thinking it. WRONG. I walk out into the hall and see the two sluts standing at his door telling him the whole damn story. I just smile and walk over and listen as they get to the part about her having issues. This motherfucker does what I should have done and says he has no problem with it and they are welcome to come jump in the shower with him and the first chick. Son of a bitch. My boy just went up three to nothing. I tuck my tail and take the elevator ride of shame back down to the lobby and the bar. I get there and attitude bitch is sitting there looking confused as hell about where her friends are. I tell her the story and she laughs and buys me a drink. We sit there chatting for a bit when I man the fuck up and try again. No dice. She informs me that had I not been a dick to her friend I could have had all three. Lesson learned I guess. McNasty comes strolling back into the bar about an hour later with his three run lead laughing his ass off as he tells me what I’ve missed. Thanks buddy, thanks a fucking lot. We sit there and hang out with these chicks for a bit more before we start to wonder around from one group of chicks to the next. We finally end up hanging out with a bachelorette party. They have the standard bullshit checklist of slut dares to finish before they can consider their night a success. We help them out with a few of their items and tell them we are in a mission ourselves. They are drunk enough to think they can help us so we are fucking golden. I’m sitting between two girls that happen to be sisters. One is pretty cute and the other is obviously the one who got to the dinner table first. I’m focusing on the skinny one and talking shit but occasionally will turn and talk to hefty. Skinny is eating out of the palm of my hand at this point. The next thing I know she takes my hand and slides it under her skirt to show me she’s not wearing underpants of any kind. Fuck yes!!! If there’s one thing I should learn to do it would be to remember the chicks name I’m talking to when I’m drinking. I have a habit of using words like cutie or some other bullshit title when I’m talking to them because I suck at remembering or caring what their names are when I’m drinking. I’m sitting there two knuckles deep in this chick and can’t remember her name for shit so I just ask sweetie if she wanted a drink. She jokingly laughs and ask if remembered her name. I said fuck yes I did and got up before she made me prove it. I’m standing at the bar waiting when hefty walks up beside me. In my mind it made sense but looking back now not so much. I fucked up and asked her what her sisters name was like she was on my team and shit. Mistake. She tells me and goes back to the table. I hit the pisser on the way back feeling good about myself. I make it back to the table and everything is the same as when I left. Skinny takes my hand and puts it right back where it was and looks at me smiling and says ok smartass what’s my name? I’m all cocky and shit because I still think I know it and her sister wouldn’t ever do anything to fuck up my night. I told her the name her sister had given me at the bar and she smiles. She leans over and whispers in my ear “do you feel how good it is down there”. I said hell yes. She hits me with “well remember it because its the last time you get anywhere near it because you just called me by my moms dogs name”. What the hell???? Yep. Her sister had not only told me the wrong name on purpose but she had told her sister all about our little chat at the bar. Fuck me damn it!!! She slides my hand out and tells me to go fuck myself. How many times can one guy be told that in one night? I’m clearly not getting anything from this group of chicks tonight since they all know what just happened so I go and sit at the bar and lick my wounds. A little while later hefty walks over to get a drink and laughs about it all. I do not feel like dealing with her shit so I tell her to fuck off. She tells me that it’s not her fault I suck at remembering people’s names that I was trying to fuck. We spar it out verbally for a few minutes when she pulls off the greatest whore move of all time. She tells me that she isn’t as uptight as her sister and she didn’t give a damn if I remembered her name or not because after she was done with me that night I would damn sure remember it tomorrow. Really lady? You just cock blocked me with your sister and now you’re telling me that you’re gonna fuck me! Whores have no boundaries they won’t break to get what they want. She tells me that her group is getting ready to leave and as soon as they do we are going to my room. Who am I to argue with that? I’m as fucked up as a ran over dog at this point so my asshole side is in control. I walk over to skinny sister and tell her I’m about to fuck hefty sister and that she missed out. I don’t know when I will learn to quit while I am ahead but I hadn’t learned it at that point. She asks hefty if I was telling the truth and they get into an all out argument about how skinny sister has always gotten first dibs on whatever she wanted and how she’s played second fiddle her whole life. Yadda yadda yadda. Feeling pretty good about myself I grab hefty by the hand and tell her she can take her anger out while she rides me. She looks at skinny and says “I’m about to fuck him like I did your exhusband”. Skinny is standing there in complete disbelief as me and hefty walk to the elevator and go up to my room. I ended up coming in dead last with only one point that weekend but let me tell you one thing folks…….I still remember Alicia Michelle N€#£€¥’s full name.
Wednesday, April 16, 2014
Saturday, April 12, 2014
We celebrate kisses in literature and art. On screen, it’s the moment we’re always waiting for, and the climax of every great love story. And in our own lives, it’s the ultimate way to express how we feel.
A passionate kiss causes our blood vessels to dilate as the brain receives more oxygen than normal. Our cheeks flush, our pulse quickens, and breathing becomes irregular and deepens. Our pupils dilate, which may be the reason so many of us close our eyes. We also activate five of our twelve cranial nerves that spread out intricately to different parts of the face. The nerve pathways guide the way we interpret the world by helping us see, smell, hear, taste, and touch.
On top of that, our lips are associated with a disproportionately large part of the brain. Sex researcher Alfred Kinsey even reported that some women could reach orgasm from prolonged deep kissing without genital contact. While this sounds unusual, it likely has to do with the way our lips are packed with sensitive nerve endings so that even the slightest brush sends a cascade of information to our brains that often feels very good. Although we often don’t think of them in this way, our lips are the body’s most exposed erogenous zone.
The kiss is a universal language that transcends time and boundaries. Decades ago, anthropologists estimated that over 90 percent of cultures practiced the custom, and with the rise of the Internet and ease of travel in the 21st century, it’s fair to assume that nearly all of us are doing it. Today we see kissing practically everywhere. It is a perfect example of how both “nature” and “nurture” can complement each other to create a single complex and variable behavior. Humans seem to have an instinctive drive to kiss, but the way kisses are expressed is influenced tremendously by individuals’ culture and personal experiences. Yet unlike other human behaviors, science has barely begun to put kissing under the microscope despite its clear evolutionary and personal significance.
How does a kiss work? It acts like a drug by stimulating the natural chemicals in our bodies. When there’s real “chemistry” between two people, the right kiss can spark the magic of true romance by triggering a cocktail of hormones and neurotransmitters to course through our brains and bodies.
Kissing keeps our bodies extremely busy interpreting an enormous amount of information as billions of little nerve connections distribute signals to help determine what happens next. As neural impulses bounce between the brain and the tongue, facial muscles, lips, and skin, these impulses produce a number of neurotransmitters that influence how we feel. The right kiss can lead to the feeling of being on a natural “high.”
One of the most important neurotransmitters kissing can promote is dopamine, which is involved in helping us feel rewarded and experience pleasure. Dopamine is likely the chemical basis for terms like “walking on air.” This is the neurotransmitter responsible for the type of intense desire that makes a new romance feel addictive. Dopamine spikes during novel experiences, and a first kiss with someone special more than fits the bill. It causes us to crave more and can even lead to a loss of appetite, insomnia, or euphoria.
Of course, dopamine is only one of many chemicals that guide our emotions during a kiss. Involved with strong feelings of attachment and intimacy, oxytocin is a hormone that can be triggered by kissing. Endocrinologists believe that it is the substance that helps keep love alive in long-term relationships after the initial novelty has subsided.
Meanwhile, a passionate kiss can also raise our level of serotonin, which leads to obsessive thoughts about the kissing partner. Scientists have observed that serotonin levels in subjects involved in new relationships look a lot like those in patients suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder. Kissing also stimulates adrenaline, which helps our bodies to anticipate what might occur next. It boosts our heart rate, which reduces stress, and can make us break into a sweat. In other words, the body’s chemical response to a good kiss mirrors many of the same feelings frequently associated with falling in love.
Love isn’t just romantic. Our brains are primed to associate kissing with feelings of attachment and security from birth. A newborn’s earliest feeding experiences at his mother’s breasts involve movements and mouth pressure similar to kissing. These actions lay down the neural pathways in a baby’s brain that continue to be important in other powerful, bonding relationships throughout his life.
Under comfortable conditions, a kiss from someone we love lowers levels of the stress hormone cortisol, reducing uneasiness and making us feel secure. However, under pressure or in the wrong setting, it can have the opposite effect, which brings up kisses that do not go so well.
Research in evolutionary psychology reports that 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women have ended a budding relationship because of a bad first kiss. When the chemistry feels wrong, both partners instinctively sense they should back off.
How might this work? A kiss puts two people in very close proximity. Our sense of smell allows us to pick up subconscious clues about the other person’s DNA or reproductive status. Biologist Claus Wedekind found that women are most attracted to the scent of men who have a very different genetic code for their immune system in a region of DNA known as the major histocompatibility complex. Pairing off with a male who has a different set of genes for immunity can lead to children that will have a higher level of genetic diversity, making them healthier and more likely to survive. (However, it’s important to note that women who take the birth control pill exhibit the opposite preference.) So even though we may not be consciously aware of it, we use behaviors like kissing to judge whether to take a relationship further, based on genetic evidence. In this manner, it’s fair to say that the act of kissing serves as nature’s litmus test.
Not surprisingly, all of the intense stimulation that a positive exchange initiates can create a very vivid memory. When Butler University psychologist John Bohannon studied over 500 subjects, he discovered that most people remember more of the detail about their first kiss than their first sexual encounter, no matter if it took place five months or 50 years ago.
Whether the experience evokes fireworks and violins, or doesn’t quite live up to expectations, the kiss serves as the single most universal and humanizing practice we all share. It is a reliable way to gauge our relationships and express our emotions, far beyond that which words can convey.
Sheril Kirshenbaum is a science writer and research associate at the Center for International Energy and Environmental Policy at the University of Texas at Austin. She is also the author of The Science of Kissing: What Our Lips Are Telling Us. Kirshenbaum was a TEDGlobal 2011 speaker.
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Friday, January 17, 2014
Just like Congressman Barney Frank.
Monday, January 13, 2014
Give us your money so we can make a movie to tell young school boys about porn... lol
Why didn't I think of that!
How do you make a whore moan?
Ask her to marry you!
"And the companion of the savior was Mary Magdalene. Christ loved Mary more than all the disciples, and used to kiss her often on her mouth. The rest of the disciples were offended by it and expressed disapproval. They said to him, 'Why do you love her more than all of us?' The Savior answered and said to them, 'Why do I not love you like her?'"
-Gospel of Philip 63.34-36, Holy Bible
'Mary Magdalene was one of Jesus' most celebrated disciples, and the most important woman disciple in the movement of Jesus. Jesus cleansed her of "seven demons", [Lu 8:2] [Mk 16:9] conventionally interpreted as referring to complex illnesses. She became most prominent during his last days, being present at the cross after the male disciples (excepting John the Beloved) had fled, and at his burial. She was the first person to see Jesus after his Resurrection, according to both John 20 and Mark 16:9. Mary Magdalene is considered by the Catholic, Orthodox, Anglican, and Lutheran churches to be a saint, with a feast day of July 22. The Eastern Orthodox churches also commemorate her on the Sunday of the Myrrhbearers. Pope Gregory the Great's homily on Luke's gospel dated 14 September 591 first suggested that Mary Magdalene was a prostitute: "She whom Luke calls the sinful woman, whom John calls Mary, we believe to be the Mary from whom seven devils were ejected according to Mark. And what did these seven devils signify, if not all the vices? ... It is clear, brothers, that the woman previously used the unguent to perfume her flesh in forbidden acts."(homily XXXIII) This identification of Mary Magdalene as a prostitute was followed by many writers and artists until the 20th century. Even today it is promulgated by some secular and occasional Christian groups. It is reflected in Martin Scorsese's film adaptation of Nikos Kazantzakis's novel The Last Temptation of Christ, in José Saramago's The Gospel According to Jesus Christ, Andrew Lloyd Webber's rock opera Jesus Christ Superstar, Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ, Jean-Claude La Marre's Color of the Cross and Hal Hartley's The Book of Life. It was because of this association of Mary as a prostitute that she became the patroness of "wayward women", and "Magdalene houses" became established to help save women from prostitution.'
"Also they [the Cathars] teach in their secret meetings that Mary Magdalene was the wife of Christ. She was the Samaritan woman to whom He said, 'Call thy husband.' She was the woman taken into adultery, whom Christ set free lest the Jews stone her, and she was with Him in three places, in the temple, at the well, and in the garden. After the Resurrection, He appeared first to her."
-Ermengaud of Béziers, Treatise against Heretics
"I think it's entirely plausible to think that Jesus may have been married. It was a normal practice for Jewish men. It would also be normal not to mention that he had a wife."
-Dr Karen King PhD, Harvard University Professor
"The sacred union of Jesus and his Bride once formed the cornerstone of Christianity….the blueprint of the Sacred Marriage, that the later (church) builders rejected, causing a disastrous flaw in Christian doctrine that has warped Western civilization for nearly two millennia."
-Margaret Starbird, The Goddess in the Gospels
"She walks upon our meadows green, the Lamb of God walks by her side, And (in) every English Child is seen, children of Jesus and his Bride."
-Song of Jerusalem, by William Blake
"I know a guy who kept whores and 12 losers around, and the jews crucified him too."
-William Shatner, Charlie Sheen Roast
BLOODLINE OF THE HOLY GRAIL - Jesus with a pregnant Mary Magdalene at Church of Mary Kilmore Church (Caell Muire) in the village of Dervaig on the Isle of Mull in Scotland where Jesus and Mary allegedly spent their retirement years in wedded bliss. John Martinus was believed in the early Christian Period to be the last son of Jesus by Mary Magdalene, born on the Scottish Isle of Iona. Britain was the first nation to officially adopt Christianity. The stained glass window reads: "Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her" from Luke Chapter 10 Verse 38-42, Holy Bible